First diagnosis(3)

I remember when the news came through. I had been living in Melbourne for four years and was over it, another story for another time.

When the phone call came it was my mum who spoke first. She was very casual about everything and told me without breaking for a breath. I could tell she was worried and dad was next to her. "The cancer's back Stu. It's in his lymph node. Your dad goes in for surgery next week to remove it and the local node. I'll put your dad on."........It took every fibre of his being to be upbeat.....He knew. His voice almost broke a few times and I could hear the pain in it as he tried to be upbeat. "I'll be fine son. This is not going to beat me." My voice choked up and I fought with every fibre of my being not to cry then and there. All I could think of was...."He's about to become another statistic. We spoke for another few minutes about the dogs and of course rugby.......It was something that we could always turn to when the conversation got to hard, sport and the dogs........His final words to me were. "I'll put your mother back on......Don't worry I'll be fine......"

When mum came back on she almost sounded relieved. Relieved that she could share the burden and could talk to someone about it. I couldn't and didn't say allot to her about it. I was shell shocked but I shouldn't of been.......I knew what was coming and I knew what I had to do..........It wasn't about me. It was all about the family and keeping it together.....

I needed time to myself. Time to digest what I had just heard. Time to come up with a plan.........I couldn't talk with anyone about it.......They just wouldn't understand........