Wednesday, 1 February 2012

First Diagnosis(5)

I don't know why I called this first diagnosis now as clearly we are coming to the end of this story. I think I lack the imagination to be witty or creative.

After, what seemed like an eternity mum finally returned from Japan. She was greeted with dad's news by dad. I had already told her so she was expecting it. All she did was be supportive in the decision that he made. That's all any of us could be. His decision was final!!!....
Life went on, and so did the tests. I don't know why.....To say he was stuffed was an understatement. It was just a matter of time.
We went back to speaking on the phone, talking footy, dogs and the usual bullshit about politics and money. He was beat, you could tell in his voice, when he spoke.......
All I wanted to do was go home, tell him to fight and not lay down........Just get up damn it!!!.....One more time. Just like you taught me to do........
My world kept falling apart slowly. Hated Melbourne, in career limbo, wanted a residency but was overlooked...........and meantime all I wanted to do was move closer to home and help mum and dad through this and just be there.......
When a chance came to move back to Queensland I jumped at it. More to the point I was going to visit mum and dad and be closer to them...............
All I felt was relief and a sick feeling in my stomach at the same time. What do you say to someone who is dying ?, How do you behave ? especially when it's your dad.........All I thought about was seeing him again since the news. How to get through this without losing my bottle ???...........

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